By far the hardest part of travel for me is the packing. My hard rule of “no checked bags and if you can’t carry it yourself don’t bring it” makes packing a challenge to say the least. It also puts into perspective how much you think you need in life vs how much you actually need. Makes me grateful that being in Central America is more about what you’re doing and who you’re doing it with rather than what you’re wearing. I can wear the same outfit a 100x and no one would even notice or care. So wish us luck as we pack 3 weeks worth of items into a backpack…Guate bound in T minutes 9 hours.
I feel like I blinked, and this trip has come to an end. No part of me is ready. I am not ready to leave my walking city with 75-degree weather, not ready for school, not ready for a lot of things that we face going back home. Being in Antigua isn’t like a regular vacation. It’s really like being in a second home…. so I never feel an urgency to leave. I also am not ready to have the girls and Luca gone. The feeling of walking away without the girls in tow at the airport was pretty overwhelming to me. It’s a rare thing to be with people for two weeks and not have a single moment where you desire a break from each other. So we either did a really great job of naturally giving each other space, or we are just really meshed so well. I have a feeling it was a combination of both. I hope you’ll hear from this crew again someday. Thanks for following along.
Here in the states when someone asks me what I do for a living I usually get one of two reactions:
1. people have the persception that we are baby snatchers, or
2. I get the dreadful “poor you how awful your job must be look.”
But in Guatemala when people ask what I do for work and I say I am a Social Worker….their reactions are quite different. Their faces light up in awe and amazingment. Much like the reaction a doctor or lawyer would get, or the same as Nicole gets when she says she’s a Midwife. I noticed this reaction my first two times in Guatemala. This time I pointed it out to Nicole and she noticed it as well. Clearly to be a social worker here means something quite different to the Guatemalan people. I wanna know more. I am intriqued by their reaction and can feel an instant endearment to me when I talk about the work I do. No one looks sorry for me like they do in the states. In the states I am not sure if the looks I get are related to the toughness of my job or the salary my job alludes to. I love the work I do and this is the first time I see a reflection back from a community that miorrors how I feel about my profession. I am intrigued and hoping next time I am here that I can have more converstations about their perspectives on social work.
Nicole touched on something in an earlier post that I wanted to piggy back on a little. She talked about a converstation she had where the fact that Nicole and I are two working non married woman who are able to travel freely was pointed out to her. Funny thing is it wasn’t until she shared her converstation with me that I even stopped to take pause about that simple fact that I clearly take for granted. If I allow myself to view my own situation from the vantage point of a typical Guatemalan woman or man…how insane that concept must seem. To be completely financially independent and to be free to do as I please is something I very much take for granted. Not to dismiss the fact that I work two jobs, but to their point the fact that I am able to find two jobs to have is something inconceivable to them. Access to education, that then gave me access to jobs (in a country with jobs), that then gave me freedom and independence. I don’t have to have a husband to survive or feed myself. I don’t require support. And because no one else is supporting me no one gets the right to dictate me either. If I choose to be with someone it is because I desire to be with him, not because I am just trying to survive. If I am in an unhealthy relationship I am free to go because I have the means to do so. I also have a huge support system in my life of family and friends that if I ever find myself in a situation I can’t manage on my own I know I have people willing to back me. It’s hard to place myself in the shoes of a “typical woman” here. Being in the outside towns and also at the clinic with Nicole the other day were great experience to help me grow my empathy, and the amount of empathy I feel is overwhelming. I also have a great deal of admiration for the hard work that living here requires. Nothing is easy here. Everything takes effort. We drove through other villages on our way to Pacaya and saw life outside of a very touristy Antigua. Watching the woman of the villages we passed having to walk down hills to the community water spouts and then lug the juggs of water back home, or carry their laundry to the community pila only to carry it home wet to hang. Women and men carring large heavy objects hanging from their heads. The quote “necessity is the mother of invention” is something you see in live living color here. They have created ways of doing things to help make life a little easier, all while, from my perspective, life is still far harder here. And yet kindness prevailes. People here are kind and genuine. Life is slower here and when you aren’t all self consumed (like we are most times in our society) you get to really engage with people. Experiences like this continue to reinforce my belief that to be human and to treat others not just with kindness but with empathy outside of our own understanding is the most coveted quality someone can possess.
22 years ago, this little tiny baby girl came into the world, and I became a God mother. I had no idea the woman she would become. Let me tell you about Kianna….
Kianna was part of my very first trip to Guatemala and really my first trip out of the country alone as the only responsible adult. To express what it’s like to be back in Guate 5 years later with her is pretty hard to put into words. But my goodness, oh how she’s grown in the last 5 years. From basic things like 5 years ago using an ATM for the first time and it happening in Guatemala, to problem solving and being aware of and observant of things around her. To this year she’s the driving force behind school. She is nearly fully bilingual now after living in Miami. Simply having her around has brought so much to my experience. The quite moments in the house gave us time to talk and the adventures gave me time to observe her and all of the great that she is. I can’t imagine being here without her. She is kind to her core, she’s got skills (like the ones that matter in relationships, in dealing with others, and with coping with life) that not many others might notice but I see them and they are impressive, especially for someone her age. She is learning about herself still and though it might not be easy for her it’s incredible to watch. I talk about just being a good human all the time to people, especially in todays climate with politics and world relations. Well Kianna is just a good human and I am so proud of all that she is and all that she is destined to become. I hope that she remembers that you don’t have to have it all figured out to know that you’re doing just fine.
What you may not realize is that we mostly blog individually, and so blogs post alerts are exciting for us too. One of my motivations for creating the blog was to allow others to get a glimpse into our experiences, but also for those of us on the trip get to hear each other’s perspective of the same events. Luca is my most consistent blogger. This year was quite different as he didn’t blog with me, but rather with Nicole or the girls. While this change in routine was hard for me, and I missed our nightly alone time to blog, it was fun to read his blogs like everyone else. In his last post, he said something casual, but it struck my heart when he said….”my Tia.” Something so simple, but yet so endearing. So let me tell you about my Luca. He gives so much love and brings constant movement to the group. He also helps me practice patience… something that is hard for this ADD woman. His love for music (something we have made a huge part of our relationship since covid days), his constant reminder to be present in the moment, and the joy that came from watching him learn in language school. So happy we get these moments and I love being his Tia.
So unbeknownst to me when I entered my first blog before leaving for Guatemala I renamed Kayla for the entirety of the trip. Instead of writing Kayla, I mistyped and wrote Kyla. Little did I know that Kayla’s teacher would also misname her on the first day of school…. and thus Kyla was officially born. I am pretty sure I won’t be able to go back to calling her Kayla, at least not anytime soon. Kyla just feels so right. It also kept the girls from being called each others names.
Each of the younger ones have brought so much to this trip and something unique to the dynamics of this trip. Kayla has brought joy, adventure, fun, creativity, competition (to our already competitive Nicole), and a sense of humor that keeps things so light hearted. She’s my kindred spirit when it comes to being game for anything. I love how unapologetic she was about not knowing something and how she really wanted to learn. She’s an adoring little sister of her big sister and sweet, patient, and fun with Luca. Is she still a typical teenager? Absolutely 💯. Think that made it even nicer to experience. She’s a very typical teenager yet at her core she’s a sweet, kind, loving young lady. I can’t wait to see how she continues to grow.
I chose not to attend school for the second week. for a couple of reasons. The first being that I haven’t had a break at all this summer. School ended, and I worked an extra week and rolled right into summer school. So, to do a little self care, I felt like I needed a break. Second, I wanted to time hanging out doing things around the city. Nicole and I booked two spa days, and Nicole decided to do a day of volunteering doing womans health in the old city. I spent a long time in my head going back and forth trying to deciding whether I was gonna tag along or not. Not because I didn’t want to go, but trying to figure out how I could be helpful without speaking the language almost kept me from going. In the end, I decided to go and just be helpful any way I could.
I have always been one to have a few close friends. It takes a lot to be my friend, but once I choose to let you in, my friendships tend to be lifelong. When I was younger, I didn’t put much thought into understanding my friendships, meaning that whoever I clicked with is who I hung out with. But as you age you gain an insight into people and realize the actual reasons why you just “click” with someone. Let me tell you about my best friend… hense the title. I am so lucky and blessed to have my best friend along on this crazy ride called life. To have someone who is willing to do things outside the box, take adventures (and keep me from dying by being more guarded than I, a nice balance), and see the world. But that’s not why she’s my best friend. She is my biffer because I admire her, because others are endeared to her, because she makes anything and everywhere better just by being there. I know how amazing she is at her job. I send everyone I know, including friends and clients to her. I trust her more than any other provider. But getting to watch her in her element (well her makeshift element) today was an honor. The facility opened its doors today to women of the community, and they came in not knowing who they were seeing but trusting her with the most sensitive of topics. I went today not knowing if there would be a purpose for me, but being there I realized that my purpose was to witness first hand my friend at work. I got to add to my admiration of who she is as a provider and as a person. Today, others got a little bit of her, and they are so much better off for having met her. I am proud to know her, to call her my friend, she is one of my favorite people, I admire her, and am so blessed to have her around for these life adventures.
When the power goes out in the states my life basically comes to an abrupt halt. No internet, no air conditioning, no stove, no microwave no way to cook food, no cell service. I am talking a complete stand still. But here, power basically means no fridge and that’s all that is truly effected. We lost power last night shortly after dinner time. So we lit candles, a fireplace, and played cards. This morning Nicole and I walked to get coffee and picked up ice to turn our fridge into a cooler. I was able to still make breakfast on our gas stove, we were all still able to have hot showers thanks to our gas heater… and life went on with very little being effected by our loss of power. It’s 65 and sunny here, and we aren’t sweating to death, but rather enjoying the day at the coffee bean farm, naps in hammocks and trail runs. Sometimes going back to basics makes life easier.
